Mayhem & Chaos: The Blog

It’s been sometime since I’ve written something, but it took my disappointment of the new Indiana Jones movie to get my blogging. *Warning, SPOILERS Ahead*

Today was a pretty good. Our boss rented out the Alamo Draft House here in Houston and treated the company to a private screening of Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull or should I say Scully? I’ll jump right into it. ALIENS? What. The. Hell?!

I’ve defended Lucas many times over but this was just…just..wow. ALIENS? Me being the historical fan, I’m fully aware of the ridiculous theories that aliens came down here and populated a hybrid, slave race or Humans. I’ve seen/read lots and lots of conspiracy theories on how the government is in league with these aliens to harvest a mass drone population; and looking around, I can see how someone could buy into that. But, for Heavens sake, WHY, oh WHY did it have to be the main plot of this highly anticipated, 20 years in the making of a movie?

I think what really set me off is that we at the office got to have an Indiana Jones marathon in preparation for the movie today. I had all three movies to watch back-to-back and get all giddy about going to see it with my wife and co-workers. For that, I’m grateful and of course for the boss taking all of us. And, judging by his tweets tonight, he wasn’t too impressed either.

Alright, lets start from the beginning, literally. The opening scene was a CGI gopher or what-not. Yes, A CGI GOPHER. That’s probably one of my first and biggest complaints. This movie did not need to have so much CGI. It’s Indiana Jones for Pete’s sake. Second, it was fairly obvious that Mutt Williams would be revealed to Jones’ son. But, it was so very anti-climactic. Hey, by the way he’s your son. Oh, really? Alright, lets go get the bad guys. Which leads me to my next gripe. The villain, or lack there of was just simply a joke to all villain in movies. Cate Bland-chet was a cheap Natasha, of Boris &, spoof. I wasn’t impressed, nor intimidated by her character.

Characters and bad acting aside, the fact that they tied in aliens to this movie was just out right silly. The Ark, the Holy Grail, the Occult were themes of the first three films. Now, one could argue and say that the cult of alien followings would make for a good theme for this movie. I would have to agree and say that it would be a good theme…for the next X-files movie. The climax of the movie was very reminiscent of the climax of X-files - did any else catch that?

I’m all for revamping a good movie and breathing new life into it. Rambo, in my opinion did a great job of it. Balboa, not so much, but eh. Halloween did it right. But this was just a shame. A down right shame.

Overall, if I take away the Indiana Jones aspect of it, the movie was fine. But for Indiana Jones, finder of the lost art, savior of slave children in India and patriot of the Holy Grail, it just did not fit. Other then Harrison Ford and the other returning characters, I feel that this was not a true Indy film.

I’ve also read a lot about Shia’s character, Mutt, coming back and continuing the Indiana Jones adventures. After seeing this movie, I really hope not! One plus: Shia didn’t have his “NO, no, no, no, NO!” moments in this movie.

Mr. Lucas, I’m a huge fan of your work, but please, please stop ruining the movies I’ve grown up on. Lord forbid you remake or make a sequel to Willow. I’ll be crushed!