My co-workers used terms like “Canadians” to express their dislike for our Black patrons. White business men equalled money, a couple on a date meant leave them alone and get a good tip. Then there was the large families. Many times, when I was a host, the “head waiters” would scold me for sitting me with a table with 2 or more kids.

It was an unspoken rule that they should only be sat with men (no women unless dressed up) wearing business suits. When I questioned this “rule” I was met with hostility and it even became the “spoken rule” that head waiters did not need to intimidate the hosts with who to sit them with.

On the topic of large families, it was said they were poor tippers. I mean, they have 2+ kids, they must not have the money to be here in our fine establishment AND tip well.

I have four, well-behaved, well-mannered and relatively (in public) quiet kids. They aren’t running around the lobby banging on fish tanks, pulling chairs out, throwing fits on the ground. They sit and play quietly with one another.

Time and time again, I have been to restaurants where it’s all over us…all SIX (omg) of us. The general attitude we feel is that of the example above. We’re here to make a mess of that server’s section, be demanding and at the end of it all, tip poorly. This is the assessment the waiter gives as we’re being sat.

So, instead of providing the service we’re due, that server takes longer than anyone else on the floor (we watch the other servers – tables with no kids), he (usually male servers treat us this way) is impersonal and rarely checks on us. Our drinks sit almost empty, our food is delivered by someone other then our server and when we ask for the things, that takes a long time. You’d think they’d have the check ready for us since they don’t want us there, yet we wait and wait and wait for the check.

This server believes we’re not going to tip well, so why bother. Little does he know my background in the industry, little does he care about our needs to be given good (not even excellent) service when we choose to (on the rare occasion) go out to eat.

When we received this kind of service, I set out to prove them wrong. I would still leave a generous 15-20% tip; sometimes more to get the point across. Now I find myself wanting to prove that it’s their own actions, not my financial ability to tip, the size of my family or anything else of the sort, that causes him to receive a bad tip.

Everyone stereotypes. Everyone. Stop lying to yourself and saying, “well, I never do!”

When I waited tables I tried to treat everyone with a fresh perspective. If at the end they proved the stereotype right, I wasn’t more inclined to take it out on the next guy. I started fresh. White, drunk, redneck men in business suits tipped me $0.10 one time. A Black family tipped me very nicely too. Alas, not everyone thinks like me – would probably be better place though

So next time you’re out, pay attention to how you’re treated. If you’re in a large family, notice how the server reacts (if you spot them while you’re sitting).

What’s your experience with stereotyping in restaurants?

Photo Credit: squeakymarmot

Why would you go to man, who is flawed and self-serving, for answers about G-d? His word, His instructions are there for us to take in for ourselves. Sometimes the simplest answer is the one right in front of you. Not blemished with man’s interpretations, man’s traditions and man’s selfish pursuit of power.

I’ve been told I can be brash about my views. Very matter-of-fact. Well, as a matter-of-fact, my views come straight from what is G-d word, His truths. People have told me, you can’t just give someone the whole truth and expect them to take it in. You have to feed them a little bit of truth here and there. No where in His word does it say to do this. However, John 8:47 says, “Whoever belongs to G-d listens to what G-d says; the reason you don’t listen is that you don’t belong to G-d”.

Ouch. That’s a hard pill to swallow. You don’t listen to what G-d says, i.g. follow his Torah (instructions), so you don’t even belong to Him? That’s not the all-caring-and-loving god I believe in! Truth be told, you’re not worshiping G-d then. You’re worshiping yourself. Your perception of a god who loves everyone. Who loves the sinner but hates the sin. I’m not telling you that you’re wrong, G-d is. The god you want to believe doesn’t exsist. Not in the Torah, the Prophets, the Writings or the Brit Ha’dashah (New Testament).

Pick up your Bible, or go find it. I’ll wait….

Got it? Okay. Open up to Mattityahu (Matthew) 1:1. Hold that spot. Now go to the last verse of Revelation and hold that spot. Notice how much of the “New Testament” you’re holding. Now, tear the other stuff out.

“WHAT?!” You exclaimed.

Well, the rest doesn’t apply to you right? So rip the sucker apart! The Torah (Genesis – Deuteronomy)? That’s for those Jews, not for me. Good stories, but it doesn’t apply here! The Prophets, pssh! They were old men foretelling of doomsday! I don’t need dead men to tell me how to live my life. The Writing (Proverbs & Psalms), well, those make for good Sunday morning worship songs, of course. Hmm…Sun…day worship. I’ll touch on that one next time.

Let me pose a question. If we are to follow Yeshua (or Jesus…yet another blog post) as he instructed us to, what is the standard by which we should follow? You see, Matthew, Mark, Luke & John hadn’t been written yet. So, something tells me that Yeshua (Jesus) wasn’t quoting Matthew 7:21 when he recited it. No, he in fact references Torah in nearly every single word he spoke.

We’ve been plagued by man’s traditions. Jews have fallen away from Torah because the Talmudic Rabbis impose the Takanot (traditions of man) on their people. They wash their hands and pray a prayer claiming G-d commanded us to do so, when in fact, no such commandment was made by G-d.

Christians see the Pagan traditions they have inherited and yet refuse to do away with their Christmas trees (child sacrifice evergreens) and Easter egg hunts (Ishtar - Babylonian goddess of fertility – egg hunt).

Yermeyahu (Jeremiah) 16:19 ADONAI my strength, my fortress, my refuge in time of trouble, the nations will come to you from the ends of the earth saying, “Our ancestors inherited nothing but lies, futile idols, completely useless.” Can a person make himself gods?

In fact, many people walk around today making themselves gods. They worship their brand names, cry out to celebrities as idols. They put their personal beliefs in front of G-d’s commandments.

“I know Christmas has Pagan origins, but that’s not what it means to me.” If I had a dollar for every time I’ve had that nonsense was thrown my way. So, people will admit to knowing the truth, yet they refuse to give up tradition and sacrifice truth. “Well, God knows my heart and He knows why I celebrate XYZ holiday”.

Really? Okay, lets go with that. G-d knows your heart, got it. So then He knows you’re purposefully ignoring His commandment NOT to follow the Pagan traditions and CALL THEM HIS. It’s your heart He knows, right? Better check what your heart is really after. Is it to seek His glory or to seek that new gadget coming out right around December 25th – birth date of Osiris (Egyptian), Mirthra (Persian), Attis (Roman), Dionysus (Greek), etc, etc, etc.

G-d knows your heart when on Easter Sunday, you congregate around a table where in the middle sits a splendid, succulent honey-baked ham. He then knows that you’d rather disobey his dietary law regarding pork then to pay his one and only son true respect by not associating his resurrection with Semiramis, The Queen of Heaven & wife of Nimrod. She who died and ascended into heaven and was cast back down in a giant egg in the Euphrates, was renamed Ishtar, and to prove her divinity turned  a bird into an egg-laying rabbit.

Yep, that goes right along with Yeshua being the unblemished, perfect Passover Lamb who sacrificed himself for the sins of the world. Go right ahead and send our daughters & sons out into the church field to find those fertility eggs left by Ishtar.

You see G-d does know your heart and mine. I’m not free of guilt or perfect by any means! I grew up believing the lies spoon-fed to me by parents, elders and religious soapbox ranters.

Take from this what you will. Leave knowing you and I have a lot of learning to do. The last 5 years have been interesting. Something my father-in-law tought me is if you truly want to give up something, ask G-d to make it detestable for you. It won’t happen over night, but if it’s in your heart to really seek His grace and follow His word, it will happen. Trust me, I cringe at the sight of bacon, often holding back a slight gag-reflex; no joke.

And that good reader is my intolerant, bigoted hate-speech. Please proceed to the comments and leave your display of tolerance by telling me I’m wrong.

He makes an appointment with his doctor. He’s been visiting this doctor for many years and trusts his professional, medical opinion. The doctor tells the man that how he is living is just fine, that while he could do things to better his everyday health, then end result is that we will all die and we should enjoy our lives. The doctor went on to say that the unhealthy things in the man’s life were tolerable; his body could handle it without damaging  consequences.

The man continued about his life for many more months as he alway had under the guidance of his trusted doctor. He went to regular visits and checkups and though he still felt wrong at times, he carried on his life.

Some years later the man knew something was wrong. Something inside him knew there was a better way of living. The man went back to his trusted doctor and pressed for the truth. Over the next few months the doctor told the man very little, yet each new visit the man was presented with more and more illness.

Months passed and the man still knew nothing about what was wrong with him. Little by little, after each visit, the doctor would clue him in to what was wrong. Clearly the doctor knew something, but wouldn’t let on.

One day the man came to the doctor, old in age, frail with illness and barely recognizable. The doctor looked at him and said, “Here is the truth. All this time you’ve had Cancer. You’re going to die very soon.”

The man was paralyzed with anger, fear and an overwhelming sadness.

“You knew the truth all this time?!” He exclaimed. “Why would keep something like this from me?”

The doctor explained to him, “I felt it was best to give you a little bit of the truth, even half truths. You were happy living your life as you did. Knowing the truth would only change who you are! Didn’t you want to continue living a happy life with no regret?”

The man died shortly thereafter.

The Truth

Many people go about their lives seeking some kind of truth about G-d. They want to know and follow His word, so long as it doesn’t drastically interfere with their world views. People go to their religious leaders who only give them half-truths or complete fabrications of mans traditions.

Would you rather go to doctor and know the whole truth right-then-and-there, or just before it’s already too late?

Part II.

Since 2nd grade I was involved in music in one form or another. From elementary school all the way through senior year of high school I was in performance choir. Not the sub-par “I need a fine-art credit” classes – the real deal. Traveling, going to festivals and contests. I was in band also. I played the tuba. No, it’s not just for fat people (Mr. Holland’s Opus reference). After high-school I even hosted a karaoke show at local sports bars.

Anyone that knows me well knows I love to sing. I love music. That’s why I’ll admit with out hesitation that I enjoy Glee. A prime-time Fox show about high school glee clubbers trying to make it through their adventure of high school.

The show itself brings back memories or performing with friends on stage. Driving on charter buses out of the city to contest. The music selection is always great. That is until recently.

The show seems to be taking the “let’s-see-how-far-we-can-push-it” road. I mean, teen pregnancy, drug use, homosexuality…sure; been there done that through Saved by the Bell, Roseanne, Full House…all the ABC TGIF night shows we children of the 80s grew up on. So, I really have no issue since it’s already been done many times before; now it’s just being set to music.

When I first heard Glee would be doing a rendition of Katy Perry’s Teenage Dream I wasn’t really shocked considering their recent subject matter and musical choices: Lady Gaga, Madonna, Britney Spears and Rocky Horror.

Then I actually listened to the song. Read the lyrics.

While they portray someone being comfortable with their partner and reliving their youth and all that jazz, the overall theme is, because you think these things about me, “I’m pretty with no make-up on” etc, “let’s go all the way tonight”…”no regrets, just love”.

No regrets? Er? This coming from the show that highlighted a high school cheerleader getting pregnant?

I get it. The song is about two consenting adults talking about putting their hands on each others skin-tight jeans and going all they in premarital euphoria with no regrets. The character feels like she’s young again, living a teenage dream. Fine. Whatever. It’s pop music. What can you expect.

Now having characters on a popular show watched by adults and teens alike is where I’m a little perturbed. It’s high-school characters – teenagers – singing about going all the way cause you think they’re funny when they tell the punch lines wrong. Teenage characters played by adults, sure. But what message are they sending?

Lately, Glee’s cast has been getting themselves in to these controversies and they don’t seem to really care – though they’ll say they’re sorry for doing it.

What’s that you say? Kids are exposed to this stuff all the time anyway? Oh sure then, of course, let’s just embrace it and not have any moral standards, right? Well, that’s what you’re implying, isn’t it? Kids see sex, drugs and everything in between in the daily lives, why not let art imitate life?

Or is art imitating life imitating art?

If that’s the case, cue up that cute snake charmer song by Ke$ha…you know the one, “There’s a place downtown where the freaks all come around. It’s a hole in the wall, it’s a dirty free for all…” cue that bad boy up and stick on the next Kid’s Bop album. That’ll sell some units. Kids singing about taking it off!

I hope Glee continues to shine as a record-setting show that brings in the masses from different walks of life. I also hope they can do it with class and not resorting to the tactics that often cheapen the value of something that was once nice, wholesome and fun.

Am I completely off base here? Do you think Glee is pushing the envelope for the sake of pushing the envelope? I mean, the show is basically the same episode format each week – do they just need something to keep us tuned it?

I make my way up to the individual selling items and ask the price and what not. Then comes the follow up. “So, we don’t trade money on the Sabbath, we’re Jewish…would you mind holding it for us till sundown?”

Reaction: Really? You don’t spend money? I wish I could be that religion.

Me: Blank stare.

Internal monologue: How about you try just not spending money.

Photo creds: Bob n Renee

Abraham Lincoln was reported to have said this, but may in fact be made up. Regardless, it’s a quote that resonates in today’s atmosphere. It highlights the corruption that we can see today running rampant in Washington; on both sides of the aisle.

The Left vs. Right, Liberal vs. Conservative, Democrat vs. Republican paradigms do nothing more then set us against one another, giving the oligarchical powers behind the scenes  the perfect opportunity to destroy our sovereignty.

They create class envy.

They perpetuate racism on both sides of the argument.

They sit back and laugh as we fight amongst each other.

How do we fix it? Revolution? Out with old?

I don’t know. What I do know is if people went back to basics, read G-d’s Word and how to live one’s life – things would probably be a lot better.

The problem with that is people tend to want to interpret what they read to fit their comfort level. They introduce tolerance where G-d said not to tolerate. They make excuses as to why they think it’s okay and G-d would understand.

If G-d was small enough to understand and concede to our interpretations, then He would not be a god with following. He would not be the G-d in the Bible. But in saying this it creates divisiveness amongst us. We’re back to the issues above. You believe it to be one way, I believe it to be another. We continue to fight. They continue to use it against us.

How do we fix it? Can we?

Today’s political atmosphere is torn between the left and the right. Both sides have the ultra-extremists who believe whole-heartily in their sides view and find it hard to come to the middle and see each others view points. I’m often met with an assault on my intellect for having a difference of opinion. Rather then having a healthy and intelligent debate, both sides attack the other side with immature name calling, attacks on religious and personal beliefs and rarely ever get to the question behind the question.

Torture has been a hot topic recently with the release of documents by the Obama Administration that catalogs the methods our country uses to extract information from suspected terrorists. Both sides of the argument have completely opposite views on torture. The left says it’s completely wrong, it should never be used and it never actually provides useful information to stop terrorism. The right says that it is a necessary and vital interrogation method that has, in fact, stopped other “911 style attacks”.

Who is right? I don’t know. What I do know is that torture, for any reason is inhumane. Has it stopped other attacks in our country? I’m not one to say, “well, they say it has, so I’m fine with that”, but I haven’t seen or heard of anymore planes flying into landmark buildings in metropolitan areas, killing thousands of innocent and unsuspecting civilians. So whether you believe the attacks on 911 were perpetrated by racial Islamists or a self-inflicted attack by our own government, I don’t think you can ignore the hard decisions that have been made by this President or Presidents in the past to ensure our safety.

Col. Nathan Jessep’s speech from “A Few Good Men”:

Son, we live in a world that has walls, and those walls have to be guarded by men with guns. Who’s gonna do it? You? You, Lieutenant Weinberg? I have a greater responsibility than you can possibly fathom. You weep for Santiago, and you curse the Marines. You have that luxury. You have the luxury of not knowing what I know — that Santiago’s death, while tragic, probably saved lives; and my existence, while grotesque and incomprehensible to you, saves lives.

You don’t want the truth because deep down in places you don’t talk about at parties, you want me on that wall — you need me on that wall.

We use words like “honor,” “code,” “loyalty.” We use these words as the backbone of a life spent defending something. You use them as a punch line.

I have neither the time nor the inclination to explain myself to a man who rises and sleeps under the blanket of the very freedom that I provide and then questions the manner in which I provide it.

I would rather that you just said “thank you” and went on your way. Otherwise, I suggest you pick up a weapon and stand the post. Either way, I don’t give a DAMN what you think you’re entitled to!

Powerful words, I think. Maybe it’s because I did my time in the Armed Services. I understand that there are certain things that have to be done in order to keep a nation of people, however ungrateful they are for that very security, safe. There are decisions being made on our behalf by those individuals we elected to represent us that are not easy ones. People on both sides of the argument spit out opinions of how they think it should be done, yet it stops there for most of them.

During the Bush Adminstration liberals, conservatives, republicans and democrats all in some form or fashion united against his policies and in their eyes they were patriots. They used catch phrases like “Dissent is not disloyality”. Now these same people, less convervative, point the finger at the people that once agreed with them and call them hypocrites and right-wing nut jobs because they’re doing the exact same thing with the current adminstration.

Why is that when someone has an opposite view from your own, the first thing people tend to do is attack the intelligence of that person or group? Are we so uncomfortable with healthy, polite and intelligent debate that we must resort to pety name-calling and personal attacks.

Sad thing is, I’m not saying anything new. This goes on and will continue to go on until we can come together and realize, whether you believe in it or not, we are one nation under god, indivisible. *GASP* Now I’m talking politics and religion. I await your insults on that

Thanks for your time and your opinions. They’re always welcomed here, unless you use a fake name and insult my intelligence

Photo credit: isafmedia